The Unicorn Job

I gaze at my son with a soft smile on my face through my blurry vision and heavy eyelids that were created in the past 3 months and change. It’s almost 2 pm and I feel like I haven’t done enough today. Paperwork is sitting on the table, along with a book I swear I’d read, laundry on the rack that needs to be folded and dishes in the sink that need to be washed. What have I been able to get done? My frustration rises to my head like filling a helium balloon. When he’s asleep, I try to stay quiet so that he can get rest and grow, but how am I supposed to vacuum the house? When he’s awake, I can’t get anything done because he has my full attention, wants to eat or play and just be held like he was inside. So where’s the balance? When does it get easier? Will it get harder? Will I ever get anything done?

I find myself getting frustrated in situations like these quite frequently and attribute them to the 4 month sleep regression, a longing for my long distance family to be closer, and postpartum hormones. But I remind myself that taking care of this human I created is my full time job. It’s a unicorn job actually, and it’s the most important one I’ll ever have. I get to watch him hit his rolling milestone, his gummy grin grow everytime Daddy walks through the door, feel the warmth of his arms trying to find me while laying together on his playmat as I fall asleep. It’s a true joy and a feeling I’ve never experienced. And I know it will get even better with time.

Everything else can wait. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to raise a child period. Being a Mom is the greatest gift I have ever been given. So here’s to reveling in it and enjoying the job I will have for the rest of my life.